It was no shocker, but I was still disappointed in myself. I continued to stare at the test as if that would somehow change the score circled in red at the top of the page.
I had garnered a test score of 76, or a middle C, on my thermodynamics test, the one I had failed to study for because of my “kingdom” activities during the last two weeks.
This term I had scored grades of Ds and Cs on every test thus far. It was my poorest performance since entering Auburn University over two years ago. In fact, last year I had scored A grades in 10 of my engineering courses and a B in the remaining two. My freshman year GPA had only been just slightly lower. And for this I had been awarded a full books and tuition scholarship by Tau Beta Pi, the engineering honor society.
If I could pull off high Bs and one A on all the remaining tests and exams then a B grade point average for the term was not out of reach for me.
But if I did not earn that B grade point average for the term then I lost that books and tuition scholarship.
However, on the Kingdom front everything was on a roll, it seemed.
Four more of my frat brothers had made a commitment to Jesus. They had started attending Maranatha Services and were being shepherded and discipled by older MCM brothers.
This meant a total of 15 people from my frat had become radical Christians in the span of about four weeks. “At this rate,” I thought, “within one year over 150 people will have come to Jesus through me.”
My heart glowed with pride.
Joe Smith had promised that tonight that God was going to heal people just like He did in the first century church.
Of course, if you have bothered to slog your way through my story thus far, you know that as frat President I was supposed to attend a weekly Chapter Night meeting. At these meetings we reviewed the week’s events, talked about issues and projects, socials, fundraisers, and made our plans for the coming term.
In addition there was the infamous pass the gavel session, where the chapter gavel was passed from member to member and each brother had up to five minutes (if they wanted it) to discuss what was on their mind.
So once I again I was scrambling.
My head hurt.
First, I did not want to miss the show of first century miracles that were supposed to occur tonight at the MCM House according to Marty, my shepherd.
Second, I did not want to miss the preaching on, “The right relationship with Jesus,” that Joe Smith had said, “would be fundamental to my faith.”
Finally, but no less importantly, I did not want to disappoint my older brothers and my Shepherd at Maranatha, that is, my new family.
So I was going to try to wiggle out of yet another frat chapter meeting tonight.
I headed to JD’s room.
As Vice President JD led a number of committees but was he also second in line if for some reason I could not fulfill my duties. This had happened occasionally in the past, but it was a rare occurrence.
JD’s bedroom door was open and I could hear the sound of Lynyrd Skynyrd’s hit song Give Me Three Steps blasting out of his stereo system.
I peeked in and saw JD with his head buried in a text book. How he could get any studying done with rock music blaring was a mystery to me.
I knocked at his open door. No response.
Again. No response.
So I stepped in and reached over and cranked the volume down on the stereo.
JD looked up immediately.
“Run out of people to proselytize Tik?” he laughed.
“Well you are barking up the wrong tree if you are looking to dunk me in a swimming pool and have me blabbering like a baby!”
JD and I had a very strained relationship at best and it was all over the frat house that twelve of the brothers had become Jesus Freaks and that our sleep in slut, Rhonda, had moved out of the house and back to her dorm room.
“I hear you broke up Rhonda and Ricky as well…,” then he snickered.
I was not taking the bait.
“Look JD I wanted to see…”
Before I could finish JD cut me off with, “Tik, if you are up here to see if I am going to cover for you for the chapter meeting you need to save your breath. I am not your f**k*ng baby sitter and nurse maid.”
His face was red.
“Calm down JD, why are you so upset?”
“I’ll tell you why, hot-shot. You are everybody’s golden boy, you crap golden apples as far as the brothers, well at least some of them, are concerned, and your red-headed stepmother (he was referring Mom our resident advisor) keeps his protective apron around you.”
He stood up and sneered at me.
“If any other frat officer, like yours truly,” and he pointed at his chest with a thumb, “missed a business meeting and three chapter meetings, skipped out on two of our post game parties, played hooky during the Gamma Delta social, and then failed to show up Thursday afternoon for this term’s pledge report out, they would be hauled before the chapter and thrown out of office; if not thrown out of the frat altogether.”
He was right of course, as President I not only had ceremonial responsibility to welcome the sorority girls, to pat the pledges on the back and make them feel special; I had an obligation to preside over the frat’s business at meetings.
But the Kingdom came first, right?
Weren’t the frat brothers just playing camp? Wasn’t the frat house a den of debauchery every Saturday night after a home game?
“JD, you know that nothing important is going to happen at the chapter meeting tonight. The only thing on the agenda is Jack’s monthly plea to give the upper classmen priority parking spaces, that’s all.”
“How do you know that Tik…what makes you so sure???” and he grinned and pushed his chair back against the wall.
He looked very satisfied with himself.
“We both know that there is nothing urgent that is going to come up that’s why,” I said.
“Well, I can tell you one thing, if our Frat President, Mr. Tik Tok is not at the meeting then I am going to move that we start impeachment proceedings against him and have him thrown out of office.”
I laughed, he was joking and needling me.
“I am NOT kidding, Tik,” he said.
“Listen, twelve of our brothers are missing practically every frat function thanks to the proselytizing of our Frat President; whose MAIN job, by the way, is to rally the frat around the chapter not get members to desert,” he almost shouted.
He sat back down, but his voice grew louder as he said, “And YOU, MR PRESIDENT,” and JD then saluted me with two fingers, “YOU have been missing in action, AWOL…no has seen from you or heard from you in the last four weeks; unless of course its meal time. You always seem to make those surprisingly enough.”
My face turned red this time.
Okay, I did not like JD, he was cynical, he was a smart ass, he was crude, but this time he was right.
What could I say?
“JD I have done a lot for the frat,” I said. “Things will get back to normal once the rally is over at Maranatha.”
“But would they every get back to normal?” I thought.
“Yeah, okay, you did a good job as rush chairman last year, I grant you Tik. But you SUCK as a President and you know what pisses me off, you are not doing JACK around here and you are getting free room and board at the expense of every cotton picking dues paying brother.”
I was completely conflicted.
I had my duty to the Kingdom, but I had a job to do at the frat as well. I knew the ups and downs of being frat president; all of it.
But the mantra in my head ran, “Seek ye first the Kingdom of God and these things will be added unto you.” I was going to seek the Kingdom first no matter what.
That was what over-comers did. They did not worry about the world.
“Well JD, I understand how you feel, but I will not be at the chapter meeting tonight and as VP you will need to cover for me.”
“Suit your own self Tik. Do what you think is best. But you can’t say I did not warn you.”
JD crossed his arms. My stomach was turning over.
I decided to head down to the Maranatha House and skip dinner with the frat. brothers.
I just wasn’t hungry.
As I walked down Magnolia Street I became angry with JD and his attitude. I thought about all of the rude things that I had seen him do to people over the years. I found my face getting hot as I replayed the crudity of his accusations.
I knew that the chances of me being impeached were about nil, but I also knew that JD would raise a stink about me and about my absences. He would get a handful of the brothers in his corner.
But the real damage would be to my reputation and would put me under the microscope of all the frat members.
I walked into the MCM house and found my shepherd Marty seated behind his desk. I explained how upset I was and that I was worried about what might happen at the frat. tonight.
Marty paused and thought before he spoke, sitting back in his chair and crossing his arms over his chest.
“First, what is happening to you is exactly what happened to the early Christians,” he said slowly.
“They were persecuted for the beliefs and stand. That is what Jesus meant when he said ‘I did not come to bring peace’.. our stand for Jesus are going to bring the attacks of the devil. We should rejoice that this is happening.” And with that he uncrossed his arms and pushed his glasses back up onto the bridge of his nose.
Now I did not feel so happy about this persecution, for I knew I actually deserved it. Although JD was crude, he was correct, I was shirking my duties for which I was paid in room and board.
“Look Tik you are in the frat right now because God has you there to harvest souls. Maybe He will call you out of the frat. That may happen. This is all in God’s hand and as long as you are doing His will then it will be okay.”
“But, “ I said, “the Frat pays my room and board and it amounts to $ 2,400 a year that I save in living expenses by being President.”
Now in 2006 that may not seem like a great deal of cash but in inflation adjusted dollars it represents about $ 7,000/year in today’s dollars.
And for a poor guy like me that was a small fortune.
How would I ever make up that budget shortfall?
“God will take care of his faithful Tik. Remember that you do not live by bread alone but by every word that comes from the mouth of God.”
He was right, I thought, I had no previous persecution in my life because I had never done anything for Jesus.
Of course this felt uncomfortable.
This persecution happened because I was overcoming the world and saving souls. This made the devil attack me. Surely God would figure out how to finance my schooling if I lost my position of frat President.
Jesus would take care of His Green Berets, I was sure of it.